Seriously you would think any pain would be the bane of my existence, right? Nope. Nope nope nopity nope. It’s hip pain. Knee pain is in there too, as a secondary, but it’s all about those hips.
When you can’t sleep because it feels like you’re hips are being crushed and separated all at the same time? That’s a magical sort of hell. When you have to surround yourself with pillows to prop up your aching body and it still hurts because OMG it’s touching you, but it’s a soft touch and it’s providing some support so you deal? Yup it’s that pain. That lovely pain of multiple Epsom salt baths a day, and if possible dips in the pool just half laying on a raft letting your body chill in the water. It’s weird, it looks uncomfortable as possible but it helps.
It’s that pain where if something takes the edge off you’re all for it. Because anything is better than nothing. And you never ever forget a dose of meds because you are up for all forms of pain relief.
This has been my world for about a week. I can’t really sit for long, I can’t lay down for long, I’ve had so many baths Ive run out of Epsom salts mid week and cried about it in the middle of the night when I just wanted a short bath to take the edge off.
Anything is better than nothing. Nights are worse than days. And little has been interesting to me. I’ve been slowly slipping into my fibro!depression where nothing matters and nothing is of interest. Not friends, not books, not favorite genres of anything.
Not my favorite mental place to be. But it’s an honest look at where I am at the moment. Tomorrow might be different. The pain might break sometime today or tonight. I can only hope it does. Mentally it’s hard to take. Even when you have practice.
When you all have your worst type of pain how do you all deal? Or not deal?